‘Cause I’ll be watching movies for the whole summer . . . Here’s where you will find me . . .

MAY

May 6. Thor. Starting the season off right. But not the 3D version.
May 14. Hobo With A Shotgun. Rutger Hauer in some bloody B-Movie badass nonsense. In terms of titles, this is better than Snakes on a Plane. It’s released on May 6, but if it lasts a week, I’ll be here!
May 21. Priest. If the reviews aren’t horrible, I’ll see it in its second week of release.
May 27. Hangover 2.

Summary: One a weekend. That’s manageable.

JUNE

June 4. X-Men: First Class.
June 11. This Saturday, I’m staying in to watch Green Lantern: Emerald Nights on DVD. DC toons are pretty damn good.
June 12. The Chameleon. ‘Cause Sundays are a good time to see a reader, and this French film looks like it could be awesome. And I’m a guy who typically avoids French movies.
June 18. Super 8. No, I didn’t forget about it when it opened last Friday. I just didn’t want to fight the crowds last week.
June 19. Green Lantern. Looks like my kids’ll be seeing two movies this weekend.
June 25. If it’s still around, I might try to catch art-house flick Beautiful Boy, a drama about a Columbine-type shooting told from the p.o.v. of the parents of the shooter, or B-action/horror flick Trollhunter if it doesn’t get completely wrecked in the reviews.

Summary: Getting a little crowded, but even if miss a couple of these I’ll be fine.

JULY

July 2. Transformers 3. I can’t believe they scared Captain America off of Independence Day. Such a shame.
July 9. Horrible Bosses. Looks hilarious.
July 16. Salvation Boulevard. A former Deadhead/now ardent Christian tries to escape his followers. It’s directed by George Ratliff, who did a great doc called “Hell House” about an antiabortion haunted house program.
July 23. Captain America! If you even wondered about this, you’re nuts. My personal most anticipated movie of the summer.
July 30. Cowboys and Aliens. I won’t fight the lines on Friday night, but if there’s a 7AM show, I’m there.
July 31. The Guard. I just love Don Cheadle. Or, I may be taken to The Smurfs, depending on my boys’ level of interest.

Summary: Now it’s getting crowded. I also may want to see Another Earth, The Perfect Host, Beats, Rhymes & Life . . . Too much to see!

AUGUST

August 5. The Change-Up. Freaky Friday for grown-ups. Looks funny.
August 6. Rise of the Planet of the Apes.
August 12. 30 Minutes of Less. A black comedy that looks like it could be funny–by the director and one of the stars of Zombieland.
August 13. Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark. It’s Guillermo del Toro, for goodness sake.
August 20. I might see Fright Night, if the reviews are decent. But I can pretty much guarantee I’ll have zero interest in the Conan reboot.
August 26. Believe it or not, nothing. A free weekend! Maybe I’ll spend time with my family!
August 31. The Debt. Jews with guns! And one of them is Helen Mirren!