Beauty and Beast
Two things: First, this book should get the award for most misleading miniseries cover of all time, because Dr. Doom is barely in it—he shows up at the very beginning and
the very end. Second, I liked it. I didn’t expect to, and there’s a lot of major problems with it, but I liked it.
It starts with Dr. Doom realizing he has a son in Hollywood and he doesn’t want a son because he might reflect badly on him. I’m told that when DonaldTrump’s wife gave birth to his son, his wife suggested that they name him Don Jr. and Don Sr. said, “What if he’s ugly?” Same kinda thing here, I think.
Anyway, from there it’s a weird love affair that comes straight out of left field and goes nowhere. Beast is in Hollywood and sees a Dazzler poster…
…And suddenly realizes she’s pretty. From there, he becomes obsessed.
He visits Wonder Man and crouches on his desk to point to a newspaper, and Wonder Man even tells him to chill: “She didn’t seem to care much about you.” So, that can be a bro telling a bro to ease back, but Beast is pointing to a headline that says Dazzler has disappeared—so it’s weird that Wonder Man doesn’t even care. Like I said, weird.
He eventually finds her and there’s a bunch of stuff with weird mutants, and a lot—a LOT—of very melodramatic dialogue. And Beast and Dazz act way, way different than the every have or ever do again.
Eventually, the story merges with the illegitimate Doom son, who is named Alexander Flynn and is a complete nincompoop. I understand that later he gets retconned out of existence.
The main thing about this is that there was no reason for it to be a miniseries. It really is just a Dazzler story. And there is REALLY no reason for there to be two Dazzler comics on the stands at the same time. She’s just not a good character.
But like I said, for some weird reason, I liked it. I also acknowledge that there is no good reason for me, or anyone, to have liked it.
Oh, and Poltergeist from the Spider-Woman comic is in it. Totally random.
In the end, Doom shows up and ends the senselessness of it all.
Creators: Ann Nocenti and Don Perlin
Grade: D+. I liked it, but I can’t explain why and there’s no reason for it to have ever existed.